Part Jay. Part Joe. Part stolen borrowed from better blogs.

So read this Amazon review instead.

(Via somewhat-hypothesis)

All I want for Christmas is to move back to Las Vegas.  And if I get to move back, I promise I’ll never make fun of the Augusta’s Hair commercial again. Okay, just one more time, but then I’m done. Really.

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I made a New Year’s resolution for 2009 that I would post at least one entertaining blog entry per day.  Now, I know it’s not 2009, but I figured if I got a head start in December that by the time the new year got here I could just change all the dates on my posts to January and say “HA – I DID IT’ to all my skeptical friends.  Or at least that’s what I would do if I had any friends.  But today, here I am, only a week into my master plan of New Year’s Eve resolution deceit, and I have nothing interesting to write about.  So instead, you’re stuck with this:

That’s right.  Mona Lisa.  At a bar.  

Now that I’ve set the standard so low, my next post will be much easier.  Much easier.

No need to worry about that moment on the lips lasting a lifetime on the hips.  Just let Photoshop erase your muffin-top.

(Actual promotional photo from weightview dot com)

While I’m sure the people over at weightview have only the best intentions (of making lots of advertising $$) with their “virtual weight-loss technology,” instead of all their weight-loss sponsors they’d be better off partnering with eHarmony, where I’m sure most of these “no, really, this is the ONLY self-pic that I have” profile photos will end up anyway.

Looks like there are 14,235 other people on Facebook also in need of better friends.  And perhaps a good rehab program.

With the economy as bad as it is, and most people looking for ways to save a few dollars, I’m sure many parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles (myself included) are looking for ways to save money on gifts for the kids this holiday season.   And what better place to start a search for some “cheap children’s gifts” than Google.  That is, unless when typing your search query you miss the apostrophe key when typing “children’s” and hit the enter key instead:

No need to risk getting trampled to death at Walmart looking for bargains.   Buy online, buy wholesale and never pay retail price again.  Not for your children, anyway.

Don’t try this at home, kids. Leave it to the experts at Gizmodo.

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